Well now; it's been a while. Just after that last post I got a job at a local electrician's office; Jamieson Electric. It has been a wild ride with them. Lovely people; very typical Islanders in some ways; kind, generous, caring and very very very resistant to change. Having had that trait beaten out of me at Chapters, I find it overwhelmingly frustrating by times.
Bobby the owner is a mix of crazy and sweet, being extremely ADHD so therefore very demanding when a thought occurs. However, he would do anything for his employees and tells the funny stories at times.
They've been doing the same things for the last 30 years with the same problems and on going complaints and of course when I came in making suggestions about changing things it was met with great resistance. Then we had a computer system crash that wiped out 2 months worth of data and the nightmare began. Of course Bobby acted as though it should have been fixed within a week or so; so there was very little support offered to Jane and I while we struggled to put the info back in and keep up with day to day work as well. Then Alinda (wife and dispatcher) went away for almost a month and we had to help with that. Then to make it even more interesting Jane was off for 10 days nursing her husband through cutting off his toe with a lawn mower.
There were days I was ready to throw in the towel and run screaming from there. The pressure was enormous; not just to get the work done but to try to get these suspicious, resistant change-a-phobic islanders to treat me with any trust or respect while trying to clean up the mess and learn the business. There were many days when I felt like they thought I was a complete idiot because I couldn't give them the answer they wanted and because they were worrying about things they had had Jenny to worry about for them for 30 years they were at times so hard to deal with. I understood their questions and worries; I'm not sure I got the same courtesy back and it made for some interesting arguments between Bobby and I; and Jane and I.
However, things are slowly falling into place and going smoother which is a god send.
As for outside work. Still struggling with the loneliness and lack of friends. Don't speak with Cheryl any more (long story and not very interesting at that) but I have begun spending time with a woman from Zumba; Dominique. Very interesting person with a colourful past and a different outlook on life.
I am off to Ottawa on the 20th of this month and can't wait to see all my family and friends. I'm fairly certain that I will be back there permanently before the next year passes because I'd rather be not doing what I dreamed there, then here all alone. Jay is very little help in the company department, despite numerous discussions and the knowledge that this loneliness will eventually separate us. I've given him every chance to connect with me but I don't believe he is capable.
I care for him but I'm so unhappy here.
Monday, 4 February 2013
Sunday, 25 March 2012
Where has the year gone
Another two weeks and it will be a year since we moved. Hard to believe. It's been a terrible and busy year but I feel as if not much has been accomplished.
I still haven't found a job despite a few highs and lows of looking and I'm not even sure what I want to do now.
Jay has changed jobs yet again and seems happy but I've been through this before with him and it remains to be seen if he stays happy.
Not sure if I've learned anything new about the island or how to live here. I think I've learned that those they embrace they embrace with their whole hearts. I saw kindness and support unimagined when Heather's mother-in-law was dying of cancer. The benefit concert was amazing to behold; the number of people who showed up and the amount of money that was raised was inspiring. So many here don't have a lot to give but they do all they can for the people in their community. Something that we experienced in Ontario where we lived but that isn't as evident in the cities.
Then there are the people who rallied around Cheryl and Rita when Rita was hospitalized. The offers of help and support they received were I think more than they expected to get.
That being said though, this same community seems to be displaying a hard time adjusting to the idea of someone who can't drink. To say that drinking is a pastime here is almost an understatement. In a province where the majority of workers are seasonal, drinking seems to be elevated to a fine art. Not a weekend goes by that you don't hear of some drinking and driving incident. Whereas in Ontario it's become almost a stigma to be the drinker in the bunch, here the odd man out seems to be the non drinker. Not everywhere of course but the general sense seems to be that abstaining seems strange.
Time and again I go places, speak with people and they all say the same things. If you aren't from here don't advertise it. It's almost possible to predict with 100% accuracy whether the person you're talking to is from the island or not just by how the conversation goes. If they're from here, they tell you about themselves; if they're from away, they ask you about yourself. Not that I mind; for the most part I'd rather hear about them then tell them my life story.
However, I did mind very much when the matter of how long I was planning on staying on the island came up in a job interview. It was a jarring incident; a question that would never be asked back home.
This is a place of strong opinions, strong bonds, deep seated beliefs and values and a well earned suspicion of anyone who wants to come here and linger. All good qualities and also all qualities which can often times get in their own way. This is a place that is extremely wary of change and that questions everything and every decision made on any subject loudly and frequently. That wariness seems so at odds with the trust they show at road side vegetable (and other commodities) stands around the island where you just leave money for what you take.
As an aside though, I do have to wonder about the propensity to use shooting as an answer to all wildlife problems in the province. It's a bit disturbing; like there just isn't enough opportunities in such a quiet place to fire a gun so let's just make one up! :)
I enjoy the personal feel to so many of the places you can go here. City Cinema downtown is a gem that couldn't exist where I come from. The stores that you go into on a regular basis where you begin after a week or so to recognise the staff; the bakery where you can get the most awesome bagels. Maid Marion's that reminds me of an old fashioned diner in every way possible. The lovely lilt of the accents; a combination of sounds that remind me of New Englanders, combined with the British Isles and strangely the Ottawa Valley twang I loved when I lived in Renfrew. The smiles you can exchange with anyone anywhere you go here.
But, it's been a year and I still feel as lonely and homesick as I did 9 months ago and it's wearing me down. Every little thing that reminds me of home and the people and events that I'm missing is like another little piece of my heart and soul are gone and I'm reaching the point where I'm not sure I can ever be myself again. And I know that I've reached the point where I'm convince I'll never have a good night's sleep again.
I still haven't found a job despite a few highs and lows of looking and I'm not even sure what I want to do now.
Jay has changed jobs yet again and seems happy but I've been through this before with him and it remains to be seen if he stays happy.
Not sure if I've learned anything new about the island or how to live here. I think I've learned that those they embrace they embrace with their whole hearts. I saw kindness and support unimagined when Heather's mother-in-law was dying of cancer. The benefit concert was amazing to behold; the number of people who showed up and the amount of money that was raised was inspiring. So many here don't have a lot to give but they do all they can for the people in their community. Something that we experienced in Ontario where we lived but that isn't as evident in the cities.
Then there are the people who rallied around Cheryl and Rita when Rita was hospitalized. The offers of help and support they received were I think more than they expected to get.
That being said though, this same community seems to be displaying a hard time adjusting to the idea of someone who can't drink. To say that drinking is a pastime here is almost an understatement. In a province where the majority of workers are seasonal, drinking seems to be elevated to a fine art. Not a weekend goes by that you don't hear of some drinking and driving incident. Whereas in Ontario it's become almost a stigma to be the drinker in the bunch, here the odd man out seems to be the non drinker. Not everywhere of course but the general sense seems to be that abstaining seems strange.
Time and again I go places, speak with people and they all say the same things. If you aren't from here don't advertise it. It's almost possible to predict with 100% accuracy whether the person you're talking to is from the island or not just by how the conversation goes. If they're from here, they tell you about themselves; if they're from away, they ask you about yourself. Not that I mind; for the most part I'd rather hear about them then tell them my life story.
However, I did mind very much when the matter of how long I was planning on staying on the island came up in a job interview. It was a jarring incident; a question that would never be asked back home.
This is a place of strong opinions, strong bonds, deep seated beliefs and values and a well earned suspicion of anyone who wants to come here and linger. All good qualities and also all qualities which can often times get in their own way. This is a place that is extremely wary of change and that questions everything and every decision made on any subject loudly and frequently. That wariness seems so at odds with the trust they show at road side vegetable (and other commodities) stands around the island where you just leave money for what you take.
As an aside though, I do have to wonder about the propensity to use shooting as an answer to all wildlife problems in the province. It's a bit disturbing; like there just isn't enough opportunities in such a quiet place to fire a gun so let's just make one up! :)
I enjoy the personal feel to so many of the places you can go here. City Cinema downtown is a gem that couldn't exist where I come from. The stores that you go into on a regular basis where you begin after a week or so to recognise the staff; the bakery where you can get the most awesome bagels. Maid Marion's that reminds me of an old fashioned diner in every way possible. The lovely lilt of the accents; a combination of sounds that remind me of New Englanders, combined with the British Isles and strangely the Ottawa Valley twang I loved when I lived in Renfrew. The smiles you can exchange with anyone anywhere you go here.
Friday, 20 January 2012
Second Showing of the House This Week
So I'm facing a morning of cleaning and straightening again. The last couple through liked the house but found the highway noisy and said that there was a lot of repairs to be done to the house. Not sure how true the second part is but there is no denying the highway issue.
Thankfully it is a bright and sunny day; a bit chilly but bearable. So Blue and I will be off to the dog park once more. He loves it there.
For myself, time is ticking away so quickly now and I'm not sure what we're going to do. Deb made the best suggestion but selling it to Jay will be tough. I can't remember when I've felt so helpless and defeated. Usually after a day or so of feeling like that I find an answer, a path to take. This time there seems to be no way out that isn't completely humiliating.
I'm amazed at the fact that we've been here 9 months and the only friends I've made are people from away. The so called friendliness of the people here is all surface. All sizzle no pop! It's like an exclusive club that I haven't learned the password to gain entrance to yet.
However, I do have a PEI license plate now, so I don't stick out on the roads and I can drive like the rest of the crazies here and fit right in! Yay!
I also have to say that the weather has been amazing. We still don't have any snow to speak of and although there has been a day or two of cold weather so far it's been fairly pleasant. Mother Nature does her best work on an island in the ocean I must say. I've watched storms come and go; I've seen winds like nothing I've experienced before and the changing of the ocean by the hour is the best show I've watched in my life. It is so beautiful here; everyday I want to stop and just stare for a while.
Thankfully it is a bright and sunny day; a bit chilly but bearable. So Blue and I will be off to the dog park once more. He loves it there.
For myself, time is ticking away so quickly now and I'm not sure what we're going to do. Deb made the best suggestion but selling it to Jay will be tough. I can't remember when I've felt so helpless and defeated. Usually after a day or so of feeling like that I find an answer, a path to take. This time there seems to be no way out that isn't completely humiliating.
I'm amazed at the fact that we've been here 9 months and the only friends I've made are people from away. The so called friendliness of the people here is all surface. All sizzle no pop! It's like an exclusive club that I haven't learned the password to gain entrance to yet.
However, I do have a PEI license plate now, so I don't stick out on the roads and I can drive like the rest of the crazies here and fit right in! Yay!
I also have to say that the weather has been amazing. We still don't have any snow to speak of and although there has been a day or two of cold weather so far it's been fairly pleasant. Mother Nature does her best work on an island in the ocean I must say. I've watched storms come and go; I've seen winds like nothing I've experienced before and the changing of the ocean by the hour is the best show I've watched in my life. It is so beautiful here; everyday I want to stop and just stare for a while.
Monday, 5 December 2011
Monday Mroning
It's been a while; mostly because I've been so depressed I haven't been able to bring myself to post anything. But it is a beautiful morning, 8 degrees going up to 11 and the sun is shining.
Had a lovely weekend with Jay; we went shopping and for lunch on Saturday and to the dog park on Sunday. Met Cheryl and Rita there and the dogs had a great play. I'm very glad I met Cheryl; she's amazing and a lot of fun. Tried to join Cathy's Epicure party but her Skype wasn't cooperating so....Placed an order anyway.
I have to comment on the fact that the people here are extremely friendly and open about sharing their life stories with anyone. I can't count the number of times someone has talked my ear off in the grocery line or other stores; telling me so much stuff I can barely follow it. Not sure if it's friendliness or loneliness that brings it out; or I just look way too interested in what they have to say. It's a bit overwhelming, coming from Ontario where if you say hi to a stranger they hesitate to respond. Just in case!
Jay finally lost it with one of the local driver and tore a strip off a woman int he parking at at the Superstore. I understand his frustration. There seems to be a inordinate amount of careless driving going on.
And I finally got my birthday gift. Love it!
Here is a picture from the dog park; featuring Blue, Molly trying to mock kill him and Mia trying to get into the action.
Had a lovely weekend with Jay; we went shopping and for lunch on Saturday and to the dog park on Sunday. Met Cheryl and Rita there and the dogs had a great play. I'm very glad I met Cheryl; she's amazing and a lot of fun. Tried to join Cathy's Epicure party but her Skype wasn't cooperating so....Placed an order anyway.
I have to comment on the fact that the people here are extremely friendly and open about sharing their life stories with anyone. I can't count the number of times someone has talked my ear off in the grocery line or other stores; telling me so much stuff I can barely follow it. Not sure if it's friendliness or loneliness that brings it out; or I just look way too interested in what they have to say. It's a bit overwhelming, coming from Ontario where if you say hi to a stranger they hesitate to respond. Just in case!
Jay finally lost it with one of the local driver and tore a strip off a woman int he parking at at the Superstore. I understand his frustration. There seems to be a inordinate amount of careless driving going on.
Here is a picture from the dog park; featuring Blue, Molly trying to mock kill him and Mia trying to get into the action.
Friday, 4 November 2011
Friday? Again?
Time flies; even when you aren't doing anything and even when while you're doing nothing it feels as if times drags horribly.
I'm trying to get motivated to go out and do something but somehow the thought of another day alone, doing nothing of import has me so depressed I can't move. I would give anything to turn the time back not just an hour but a year; to never have come here.
Jay doesn't want to know or see how depressed I am so I'm reduced to blogging into cyberspace to get these feelings out into the open; knowing no one really hears me. I've never really succeeded at anything and this whole move has just been another failed attempt at making something of myself.
I'm trying to get motivated to go out and do something but somehow the thought of another day alone, doing nothing of import has me so depressed I can't move. I would give anything to turn the time back not just an hour but a year; to never have come here.
Jay doesn't want to know or see how depressed I am so I'm reduced to blogging into cyberspace to get these feelings out into the open; knowing no one really hears me. I've never really succeeded at anything and this whole move has just been another failed attempt at making something of myself.
Monday, 31 October 2011
At Least It's not Raining
Can't sleep but this will be a short post. Halloween came and went with no trick or treaters of course. Out here not much chance of that. I really miss Savannah today; missed going out with her and watching her just bull her way into people's houses after the first couple of doorbells. She knows what she wants that girl!
They want to change Halloween to the last Saturday of October here; because they don't want kids tired at school the next day. For the love of god, why bother? So what if kids are cranky one day out of the year; let them have their fun. I hate when the government wastes time on stuff like this, getting involved in something that they shouldn't interfere in, rather than taking care of what they were hired to do; govern.
Oh and a jacuzzi at the hotel is haunted; keeps turning itself on and off. Thankfully Jay didn't have to go in to deal with that one. Maybe they called ghostbusters....I think I should go to sleep.
PS Debi is taking me to see Mama Mia when I'm back home for my birthday. Yay! I love Mama Mia.
They want to change Halloween to the last Saturday of October here; because they don't want kids tired at school the next day. For the love of god, why bother? So what if kids are cranky one day out of the year; let them have their fun. I hate when the government wastes time on stuff like this, getting involved in something that they shouldn't interfere in, rather than taking care of what they were hired to do; govern.
Oh and a jacuzzi at the hotel is haunted; keeps turning itself on and off. Thankfully Jay didn't have to go in to deal with that one. Maybe they called ghostbusters....I think I should go to sleep.
PS Debi is taking me to see Mama Mia when I'm back home for my birthday. Yay! I love Mama Mia.
Sunday, 30 October 2011
It's Raining Again
I also went to a book sale and craft sale with Irene yesterday morning. The book sale was okay; got a pile of books for $12 and the craft sale we didn't see anything either of us liked. Charlottetown is very much a small town feel with the "everyone knows everyone" experience happening all around you. These kinds of sales are just opportunities for people to meet up and stand around chatting.
At the dog park met another guy who just moved from Ontario; Hamilton to be exact. We were discussing the practice of tail docking because there were three boxers and a rottweiler at the park. PEI has banned the practice, which I completely agree with; it's essentially only done to maintain breed standards and seems cruel and pointless. Was surprised to find out that a community on PEI has banned the owning of rottweilers (and pit bulls) outright. I've never personally met a vicious rottweiler; most of the ones I know have been huge babies. Sounds a bit like an over reaction on the part of that specific community.
Really have to say that one of the things I love most about this island, is the crazy weather. It can be quite extreme and it changes in a heartbeat.
Anyway, that's about all that I have to say for now. Here are a few more pics of the cleaned up, open house ready, home.
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